I am finally learning how to handle confrontation.
I'm a self professed people pleaser. I was always afraid of getting in trouble at school and I've never really been able to stand up for myself even as an adult. I've watched adults in my life do things that were incredibly stupid and then never apologize or make excuses and keep a fight going for nothing! I've always said I want to learn from my mistakes and from watching those adults and not make the same mistakes over and over again.
I had the perfect opportunity to take a step toward that yesterday. I work in extremely stressful conditions for my day job. I'm a first responder emergency dispatcher. If you need police,fire, or ems in my area...you get me...in three cities. I also worked an incredibly JACKED UP schedule. I'm midnights for two days and days for the next two. Thankfully I'm off for three days and with my family of seven...that doesn't mean rest and relaxation on my days off....but I digress....
So Saturday was SUPER stressful. Hardly any sleep and just alot on my plate. I was about to leave work and did something incredibly stupid. I gossiped with a coworker about another coworker. I know better than that. There are just some jobs where it's like shark infested waters....no one is safe. But for some unknown reason, I decided to put my stupid hat on and say something to someone I KNOW I can't trust. I get a text message from the person who I talked about and the fight is on. Yeah...through text message...very mature right? I flew back with a couple of things and so did she then I left it alone. Then something hit me that I needed to fix this. I know it was God telling me to right a wrong. Knowing that not only was this person angry at me and just might not answer her phone, but she was also at work and prolly very busy, I sent a text. I apologized for saying what I said and told her this argument really didn't need to go any further because the fact is that I was in the wrong and mudslinging doesn't need to happen. She accepted my apology and it was done. It's not a great feeling to know you're wrong, but facing it head on sure does make me feel better in the long run. I guess that's confrontation...is it?